ethics part II: more complaining

This blog truly is becoming my vent for life-related frustrations. Anyhow:

It's truly starting to annoy me that I have to bend so many of my ethical principles. The latest one is lying. I do my best NOT to lie - if I do something wrong, I will tell people. I *WILL* face the consequences of my actions instead of lying to cover them up (occasional playful fibbing doesn't count ;) ).

At work I have to lie. Not about myself, but about the work I do. And it's fully endorsed by management to cover our butts. And I do it on a variety of documents. Most of the time, I'm "distorting" the truth... sometimes it's an outright lie about the things that I'm doing or have done. That's about all I can say just in case anyone from NIH, NIDA, or the office of naval research is reading this (*cough cough*).

I feel like I'm accruing bad karma b/c of work. I swear, I'm goign to reincarnate into the piece of rock that some backpacker is going to lay a turd onto and make shmear art with.

In contrast, I miss even the work I did at St Bernard as their "Internet Analyst". Yes, in a way, I was impeding freedom of speech with the web filters. But I was always categorizing - never outright telling people what they could and could not see online. And it always felt like good, honest work.

I guess the bottom line is, I feel like everything I associate with work, including my work self, is fake. And I hate fake people. I hope they all reincarnate into the rock that kayakers use to sh*t-putt into the ocean.

Yes, that means 90% of the Socal would turn into a varitable scree field of rocks to be sh*tted upon. Imagine that.