Monday, October 03, 2005

ethics vs survial

So today's post covers a fundamental question about capitalistic societies - do you a) work regardless of personal ethics and morals to gain a buck b) maintain your integrity but live a life of poverty?

I think most people would take choice c) somewhere in between.

I work in a job that involves some military projects. I've also recently been given tasks to be more of a business manager. Two problems with this: 1) I hate the general idea of an offensive military force. Defensive forces like the natonal guard, coast guard - I see the necessity of those. Offensive forces in a blatantly required war (i.e. war against hitler) is something I can tolerate (but is still debateable). I also understand that alot of scientific accomplishments are from military spending (i.e. the Internet). But it's still something that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. 2) I hate capitalism. I don't like the competitive spirit and that's what capitalism is - it's a darwinian method that takes advantage of people's inherent cut throat competitiveness to earn a buck. And for me, competitiveness has an inherent problem: there's the winner and a loser. In a perfect world, people would coexist and not produce any winners OR losers. So business plans, financial gains and general acquisition of money and/or stuff falls into this category.

So my problem is this: I need money to survive in this american society. But do I give up the standards by which I feel I should live (code of ethics). If I do give it up, then does it mean that all ethics are liable for disintegration in the face of survival? Where is the civility in that? Shouldn't we, as a "higher species", be able to live for something greater than survival? What about integrity? Is it truly just a dream that is unattainable?

I thought about this today when I was in a business meetnig with Japanese visitors to our clinic. My job was to try and sift through the B.S. and find out if these people were truly serious about doing business. I put myself into a Zen state of full awareness (as much as I can in my quite unlearned state) and studied their body reactions, statements, etc. And I felt disgusted with myself for using meditation practice for something so little as business.

Ugh... I need to just live in a climber's commune somewhere.

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