Give me liberty or give me death!... actually, just give me death and I'll be happy...

Tentatively: 3 day trip up Bear Creek Spire in the Sierra Nevadas.

This should be exciting. I've never done a serious backpacking trip, never done a technical climb at altitude, never BEEN at altitude (13,700 ft... that's 4180 m for you non-American readers). Absolutetly stunning. I'm going with my buddy Robb - an Alaskan native with some experience in high altitude terrain.

So what's with the title of this post? A combination of recent events has lead me to be dangerously curious with death. I've never really faced death before. I can summon a powerful simulacrum of Death facing me down and ready to take my life - but simulations can only take you so far. I'm currently desiring to be placed in that absolute most uncomfortable zone.

Why do you ask? All things are impermanent - it's a fact. I feel like absorbing the concept of Death into the very marrow of my bones is a wonderful spiritual opportunity. Second, having sent Where Boneheads Dare has brought to light how I enjoy exploring my mortal fear. It brings about a quiet and immediate awareness to life. Third, somehow, somewhere over the last couple of weeks, I've lost that subtle awareness to life and am stuck in a rut. Fourth, I simply want to test my limits to their very edge.

It's not that I want TO die... I want to explore a very real possibility of death out in the mountains. Something about placing myself in an unforgiving environment has a unique call to me.

This brings to mind something else - someone recently asked me that it takes a certain level of courage to open myself up to the cyber-community. I just shook my head and disagreed. Part of the truth (it's always a part... remember that...) is that I am involved in a dangerous hobby - this blog is partly a testament to who I am at this point in my life. I hope that if I'm no longer of this world, it sheds some truth to my actions. Some of the blogs are laced with hints about my intentions to specific people - just so there's no misunderstandings.

Honestly, things should be fine. my friend did it in 13 hours car->peak->car. I'm taking 3 days to do it. I'm with an experienced partner. I'm honestly not that worried (now this is the point where everyone is carefully considering whether I'm telling the truth or telling them something less honest...).

Death is such an interesting topic... so exciting!!!! woo hoo! Party at my corner of hell!!! I'll bring the demons, alcohol and prostitutes!!!!!