It's Jtree Season!!!

It's the end of September which means it's time to go climbing for my birthday per annual tradition. This year is mostly like the last - Joshua Treeeeeeeeee!

I can't begin to express how excited I am. All day at work today it felt like Christmas Eve and I'm 12 again. The anxious glances at the clock, wondering when Santa, or in this case - Joshua Tree, would arrive. It's that same nervous jitter that you can't contain no matter how much you try. I love it.

As much as I love Black Mtn, the last few times I went it's been feeling like work. The same old problems, the same attempts. The same drive. Just work work work for the ascent. The trip to Holcomb Valley earlier this month reminded me how much I missed the long lonely climbs up a route without the distraction of others around me. As much as I enjoy the support of my friends, there's something to be said about being up high and being alone.

I wanted to say something poignant about the meaning of climbing to me too. I had some great thoughts in the shower, but alas - like many thoughts in the shower, they got washed away down the drain when I turned the refreshing water off. I guess the thoughts that I had had to do with how much I appreciate climbing is for my own personal spiritual and emotional growth. "Spiritual?!" you might say... yes, that's what it means to me. I think with the last few trips to Black Mtn something was lost - I'm not sure if it was certain people in the company, the weather, the problems or what, but something has been lost.

I feel as though Joshua Tree can afford me that growth again. I'm trying to shake off my expectations of the coming season as best as I can as I go forward tonight, alone for the drive, into the desert. I can hear U2's songs about the place with streets with no name running through my head like a siren in the distance. It's so beautiful.

My plan for this weekend is to go forward and climb not with the youthful exuberance of my peers, but with more of a warrior monk sense of drive (as cheesy as that sounds, it's the closest analogy I can think of). I'm feeling a serene sense of calm as a mentally prepare myself for the frightening run outs and the thoughts long falls. It will be beautiful. No sense of the crap that is associated with city life / social life - just me, the rock and movement.

Anyways, this entry is becoming increasingly disjointed and cheesy. So with that, I salute you world - and Joshua Tree. I hope you all have as much fun as I do as I go out to enjoy myself in such a magical world this weekend.

getting older

I'd just like to point out that it's not a midlife crisis if you've always enjoyed fast cars, dated younger girls and/or generally acted immature :)

New bus drivers

Kinda funny - I got on the bus today and one of the passengers had to give the driver directions on where the route went.

Good thing I wasn't the only passenger - I just moved to my new home last week and am still figuring out the route / stops / etc. Then again, I might have been tempted in getting a free ride to REI or something.

If I could pull that off, I'd have to dress up in my bling - I'd feel like one of those Hollywood types being chauffeured in a stretched Hummer Limo... cept my "limo" would be twice as long and a little wider, with a huge bright sign on the front and back telling the world where I was headed. And it'd have hydraulics to lower the "limo" to the curb so I wouldn't have to exert myself as far.

I guess I'm not fully evolved...

Depending on the species, the instinct to protect the young of the herd / pack / group is a powerful one. I think we've all seen the National Geographic episodes about African waterbuffalos or have seen nesting birds protect their young from predators. It's strange, but I've been feeling the same instincts towards my friends' kids (and more of my friends are getting pregnant it seems...). My friend Anita just recently gave birth to her new son and seeing the pics of the child, I had this very strong sense of love and protectiveness over him.

"But Obi, he's not even your kid. You haven't even seen him, nor is he related!" you might say. An expression I once came across comes to mind - "God chooses the family you're born into, but you choose the family you grow up with" (or something like that - I'm horrible at remembering quotes word for word). Basically it means that even though you may not be born into the family of your friends, your can share a bond equally powerful with your friends as to that of your own kin. And I think in this case, that's sort of what I'm feeling. Anita has been my close friend for a little over 10 years. Even though we've drifted apart at times, I've still considered her family. And through that extension, I feel like the child is part of my family / clan / herd / pack / whatever.

In any case, it's really weird to feel these feelings. I'm normally a pretty emotionally flat guy (I get irritated, amused, etc - but I don't get "furious" or "passionately involved" very often) so feeling a strong sense of "protect the younglings!" is a new feeling for me.

I guess I'm not quite as evolved and separated from the ancient instincts as I thought I was...